GearEssentials

Bondage

Since the international best-seller Fifty Shades of Grey hit the mass consciousness, there has been a huge interest in BDSM. But what is it? Also known as ligotage, it is the consensual bondage, tying or restraining of a partner (or partners) for erotic or somatosensory stimulation. This is accomplished by using cuffs, police-style handcuffs, straps, leather, rope, tape, bandages or other restraints.

Why do people do it?

Pleasure can be shared by both parties. The active partner (the one doing the tying) may gain pleasure from the passive (the one restrained) partner’s submission and a feeling of a transfer of power and control. Studies have shown that many professionals in positions of immense power find BDSM to be an excellent way to unwind, let go and get off.

The active partner can also get off visually by seeing the passive partner tied up and apparently helpless.

The passive partner often gains intense tactile pleasure due to the reduction of some of their senses (such as being blindfolded for example) as well as from a feeling of helplessness and immobility. In addition, there is a sense that they are not responsible for any of the activities that are going on. Those shouldering intense shame or guilt around certain sexual practices can find this to be immensely freeing, sexually exciting and gratifying.

In all BDSM activities, it is highly recommended that you have a ‘safe’ word. This means that if the activity takes you to a place where you are afraid of permanent harm you can say a word and the active partner will release you. BDSM should be completely based on trust in your partner. Discuss proposed activities beforehand (or not—if that is your turn-on!)

Play safe!